Autobiography

This Is Not a Pity Memoir

This Is Not a Pity Memoir

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  • Create Date：2022-06-19 01:19:49
  • Update Date：2025-09-06
  • Status：finish
  • Author：Abi Morgan
  • ISBN：0358682959
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Reviews

Krissie Papworth-Sommers ，

Loved it！ Extremely moving， interesting， engaging， dramatic。

Stella Lewis ，

Not sure about this memoir。 I echo the sentiments of Petra （below） and think it should have been kept as a private documentation rather than being published。 They all went through a lot and my heart goes out to them。 I'm not sure I could have coped and they say don't criticise someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes。 I hope things are improving for this family。 Not sure about this memoir。 I echo the sentiments of Petra （below） and think it should have been kept as a private documentation rather than being published。 They all went through a lot and my heart goes out to them。 I'm not sure I could have coped and they say don't criticise someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes。 I hope things are improving for this family。 。。。more

Anoushka ，

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers。 To view it， click here。 Abi Morgan’s husband， Jacob， suffered a life-changing brain infection and was put in a medically-induced coma for 6 months。 On waking， he thought Morgan an imposter。 During his recovery， Morgan herself had stage 3 breast cancer。 The trauma at the heart of this book is beyond questioning。 From a literary perspective it can be easy to be disappointed by the writing of books like these。 Authors have the momentum of real life events to fall back on and the shock of the traumatic happenings to punctu Abi Morgan’s husband， Jacob， suffered a life-changing brain infection and was put in a medically-induced coma for 6 months。 On waking， he thought Morgan an imposter。 During his recovery， Morgan herself had stage 3 breast cancer。 The trauma at the heart of this book is beyond questioning。 From a literary perspective it can be easy to be disappointed by the writing of books like these。 Authors have the momentum of real life events to fall back on and the shock of the traumatic happenings to punctuate the narrative， and then there are the misery memoir and sentimentality traps to fall into。 Despite being a keen reader of life writing， I read relatively few “this traumatic thing happened to me” memoirs。 But， I am shallow， as far as books go， and this one had a *really* good cover。 As a writer of BAFTA and Emmy winning dramas， it is quickly clear that Abi Morgan is all too aware of the potential literary pitfalls in writing about something like this。 She is also， unavoidably， bleakly aware of the narrative value of events as they happen and uses this to her advantage。 She is （too） hard on herself， and funny and manages this challenging material well。 This book felt like a postcard from the edge and raised all kinds of questions for me on the inadequacy of the word “love” as Morgan reckoned with bringing home a fundamentally changed man with high care needs who denied that they were partners。From a writing point of view， I liked the immediacy of the way the text broke down into a semi-stream of consciousness as Morgan grappled with events。 Sometimes the economy of a phrase at a particularly difficult moment made me catch my breath。I still experienced that slight voyeuristic squeamishness that comes from stepping into the worst moments of a stranger’s life， but as a fellow carer， I recognise we need more literature which lifts the veil on the challenges of relationships where there is also dependency and a need for care。 I read this in one day， which tells you all you need to know。 。。。more

Basic B's Guide ，

45% and I’m dnfing。 This stream of consciousness is not for me。 It’s just not clicking for me like I feel like it should。 The explanation behind what comes to be is not what I expected and feels dramatized。Thank you Harper Audio for the gifted listening copy。

Leslie ，

The writing is incredible。 It is very clear why Abi Morgan is an award-winning writer of movie and television scripts。 I was completely absorbed by Jacob & Abi's story。 Their harrowing journey through several years of scary health crises had me wondering， "what would I do？"， "how would I handle that？" Joining their journey was hard， but also a privilege。 I appreciated Abi's candor。 She didn't hold back。 The reading gets hard。 If you pick this memoir up， expect to feel the heaviness， but stick ar The writing is incredible。 It is very clear why Abi Morgan is an award-winning writer of movie and television scripts。 I was completely absorbed by Jacob & Abi's story。 Their harrowing journey through several years of scary health crises had me wondering， "what would I do？"， "how would I handle that？" Joining their journey was hard， but also a privilege。 I appreciated Abi's candor。 She didn't hold back。 The reading gets hard。 If you pick this memoir up， expect to feel the heaviness， but stick around until the end。 I don't think you will regret it。 。。。more

Ellora ，

Playwright and screenwriter Abi Morgan dives into her experience of caring for her husband who is placed in a medically induced coma and how when he awakes， he does not recognize her。 This is such a strong story of love and family which made it equally heartbreaking but hard to put down。 I liked Morgan’s comments throughout the book tying into her film career by saying stuff like “if this was TV， we would cut this part。” While this book is realistic and hard to read at times， Morgan does add in Playwright and screenwriter Abi Morgan dives into her experience of caring for her husband who is placed in a medically induced coma and how when he awakes， he does not recognize her。 This is such a strong story of love and family which made it equally heartbreaking but hard to put down。 I liked Morgan’s comments throughout the book tying into her film career by saying stuff like “if this was TV， we would cut this part。” While this book is realistic and hard to read at times， Morgan does add in some of her own humor alongside her raw and emotional story which just adds to the power of this book。 Overall， I found this book so powerful and so human。 Do yourself a favor and check this one out！Thank you to Harper Books for an ARC in exchange for an honest review！ 。。。more

Margaret ，

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers。 To view it， click here。 I read a lot of medical memoirs because， well， been there done that。 I saw this one on Goodreads Firstreads and luckily for me I won a copy。 The author is a playwright and screenwriter who lives in the U。K。 。 Her partner was an actor。 In spite of being long term partners and owning a home and having two kids together， they had never married。 He has multiple sclerosis and had been under treatment for some time when he collapsed and was hospitalized。 After being in a coma for months and months， he I read a lot of medical memoirs because， well， been there done that。 I saw this one on Goodreads Firstreads and luckily for me I won a copy。 The author is a playwright and screenwriter who lives in the U。K。 。 Her partner was an actor。 In spite of being long term partners and owning a home and having two kids together， they had never married。 He has multiple sclerosis and had been under treatment for some time when he collapsed and was hospitalized。 After being in a coma for months and months， he “ woke up” but did not recognize Abi （ the author）。 He thought she was an imposter！ To make matters worse， while she is still dealing with all of this， she is diagnosed with breast cancer and has to undergo treatment while at the same time keep dealing with his situation。 Eventually he is able to come home， but needs constant care。 It is found out his collapse and illness that changed his life was caused by a medication that he had been taking to treat his MS。 The author has an interesting way of writing that really drew me into the story and I found the book hard to put down。 At the same time though， it was hard to read （ maybe because of my own experiences）。 。。。more

Michelle Dodd （Creaney） ，

Listened。 BBC Sounds。

Emmalee Caviness ，

This book goes through the hardships of life that we over look。 The little things that we do everyday that we no longer have it takes a toll on life。 Abi Morgan shows us this in her story and how her life has changed her。 It is beautiful and emotional。 This book is written beautifully。

Petra wonders if Prince Charming got lost？ ，

Review All other reviews of this book， at the time of writing， were of freebies。 Mine wasn't。 With an average of 4。4 over 43 reviews and 197 ratings， I fell for their hype。 I did exactly what the publisher wanted me to do， believe that there are almost 200 people who have read the book and almost every single person has raved about its brilliance。 Give me your $$。 It may not be the bottom line is so important for an author， but it certainly is for the publisher。The book was hyped as being about Review All other reviews of this book， at the time of writing， were of freebies。 Mine wasn't。 With an average of 4。4 over 43 reviews and 197 ratings， I fell for their hype。 I did exactly what the publisher wanted me to do， believe that there are almost 200 people who have read the book and almost every single person has raved about its brilliance。 Give me your $$。 It may not be the bottom line is so important for an author， but it certainly is for the publisher。The book was hyped as being about what it was like for the author to have her partner come out of a 6 month coma and treat her as a stranger。 This is Capgras syndrome where someone believes that their partner or friend etc has been replaced by a double。 But this is not mentioned in any blurb or review I read， but it is once in the book。 It is rare， I did know about it and thought it must be distressing to be declared the 'imposter'。 I didn't know in advance， that it was going to be a Capgras issue。The idiosyncratic writing had no flow and was like stream-of-consciousness， but being careful planned and edited， it didn't have the immediacy of that kind of writing。 I kept on going despite the writing frustrating and even annoying me， just to get to how she dealt with her partner's thinking she was not herself but a duplicate。 But when I eventually got there， through his illness， his hospitalisation， her own health issues， and everything else， there was hardly anything about it。 It wasn't the main focus at all。 Damp squib。 The author was concerned about building a life for the future together， with a man who would forever need carers， be physically-challenged and never be able to be intimate again。 I do admire her for these efforts of building a life without passion， without even possibly sharing a bed again。 Carer， parent and friend， but not lover - not an easy choice for a future。 I understand 'for better for worse' but they weren't， in fact， married。 If the book had been subtitled， 'Our lives as extremely successful showbiz types with houses in London and Italy were wrecked by an unknown neurological disease， extended coma and then cancer and how I dealt with all that and still managed to write Hollywood scripts'， I would have understood that I was not the right reader。 I rarely read autobiographies or memoirs unless the memoir is about an exciting adventure。 I was reading some of the book aloud to my son last night and he said，'She does go on， doesn't she？' and， about the constant repetition， sometimes the same phrase in three short lines in a row， 'is this all about filling space？' I don't think it was， I think the author， apparently a much-lauded writer though I've never heard of her （nor him， the famous actor） thinks she has a really unique way of writing， that reflects her feelings at the time of the events。 In the early chapters， it does （but it isn't easy reading）。 I also wonder if she did it to bring rhythm to the physical text - paragraphs broken up by half a dozen three-word lines in a row which does look different。 （There are several examples in 'reading notes' below）。 But really who knows？ I'm not the only reviewer who found the writing difficult to read though， and for anyone who can get through it without exasperation， much respect to you。 Also， as I said， I was not the right reader for this book， but the blurb， hype and the freebie reviews led me to believe I was。 You might be。 I might be the outlier here。__________Reading notes I am beginning to hate this book。 Chapter 4 and we are back to two-three word sentences， like lists。 Endless pages of them。 It isn't going anywhere。 He's in a coma， she relates her life， she relates their backstory of him， successful actor， her， prize-winning screenwriter。It's boring， boring， boring。 And the author knows this That you， like us， must be tiring of this。That this bit will never make the script。The movie of this。It will be a couple of scenes at best。Possibly cut with a montage to include the walk on Primrose Hill with my mum and Mabel and ice-skating at Somerset House in those last days of December。And maybe with me circling the heath， mist low， dog in tow， looking mournfully at Hampstead Ponds， icy and freezing。And， of course， me picking up the jar of honey， tearfully smiling at the box of eggs。But it happened。It really happened。 And what no one tells you about proper unfolding tragedy is that it is scary， and adrenalizing。But mainly it is boring。The waiting is boring。But I don’t know how to get to the next bit until we’re past this。 __________Who am I to criticise the writing of a famous and award-winning （view spoiler）[as the marketing that GR used to forbid in favour of a proper blurb informs me （hide spoiler）] writer>I'm just a reader but my own experience of the writing is it is almost unreadable。 It's absolutely self-indulgent but it absolutely suits what the author wants to convey， her state of mind I think and for two long， endless chapters。 Fractured sentences of one-three words and a great deal of repetition。 An example: "What do you do？" Shakespearean beard is sitting opposite me。Say it。Say it。I can say it。I get paid now。Almost paid now。I can say it。I am almost earning money。 A decade of waitressing almost behind me。"I'm a writer。" If I hadn't read in a review that the reviewer had also not heard of the author and also disliked the writing I mightn't have perservered。 Still， the third chapter is written in proper long sentences conveying information rather than the author's state of mind。 It's an interesting topic， a partner come back from a coma and not recognising their wife， so I despite the first two exasperating chapters I haven't given up。 It might yet turn into a 5 4 star book。 It didn't。 It might for you。 。。。more

Tina Rae ，

Okay so this is HANDS DOWN one of the best memoirs I have EVER read！I was initially drawn to this one because I love so many of Morgan's screen works （particularly The Hour！！）。 But this just absolutely sucked me in。 I can’t tell you how PHENOMENAL the writing is in this book！ I mean， I know she can write but I was absolutely blown away by how powerful the writing is in this book and how eloquently she told her story。And how absolutely heartbreaking this story is。 This is a very， very tough read。 Okay so this is HANDS DOWN one of the best memoirs I have EVER read！I was initially drawn to this one because I love so many of Morgan's screen works （particularly The Hour！！）。 But this just absolutely sucked me in。 I can’t tell you how PHENOMENAL the writing is in this book！ I mean， I know she can write but I was absolutely blown away by how powerful the writing is in this book and how eloquently she told her story。And how absolutely heartbreaking this story is。 This is a very， very tough read。 At times I had to set the book down for a minute because I couldn’t stop crying。 I can’t even imagine living through this and coming out the other side coherent enough to tell the tale。But humans are strong and they persevere。 And that’s what I took from this book。 There’s a lot of pain in these pages but there’s also a lot of hope。So I think this is an important story and I’m glad she chose to share it with us。 We， as humans， connect not only through joy but， most acutely， through pain。 And reading something like this not only makes you feel for the person writing it— the person who actually experienced it —but also makes you evaluate your own life and relationships。So hold your loved ones close because you never know what might happen。 And also please read this book！ I cannot recommend it more highly！！ I know it’s a story that will stick with me。（Also please please PLEASE watch The Hour。 Okay thank you！）Thanks to Harper Books for sending a copy of this my way in exchange for an honest review！ 。。。more

Susie Dumond ，

Abi Morgan's life was upended one day when she found her partner Jacob unconscious in their home。 She spent a hellish six months trying to hold their family together as Jacob was in a coma， with doctors desperately trying to find out what had gone wrong and how to save him。 When Jacob finally woke up， it seemed like their family had been granted a second chance — until they realized Jacob didn't recognize Abi and was convinced she was an imposter。 This memoir seems too wild to be true， but it is Abi Morgan's life was upended one day when she found her partner Jacob unconscious in their home。 She spent a hellish six months trying to hold their family together as Jacob was in a coma， with doctors desperately trying to find out what had gone wrong and how to save him。 When Jacob finally woke up， it seemed like their family had been granted a second chance — until they realized Jacob didn't recognize Abi and was convinced she was an imposter。 This memoir seems too wild to be true， but it is！ Abi Morgan's story shows that every worst case scenario can somehow get even more terrible。 Despite it all， she managed to find hope， joy， and community。 As the title tells us， she isn't looking for pity。 Instead， it's a story of strength through tragedy and the ways disaster makes you look at life differently。 This is a stunning story told in an engaging and fascinating way。 I highly recommend it！ 。。。more

Harleigh Thornton ，

Abi Morgan is an Emmy award winning UK screenwriter and playwright who juggles a career， family， and cancer。 This book is her memoir and is a stunning collection of words and thoughts that are all too relatable despite Morgan’s traumatic experiences。 When she finds her husband unconscious on their bathroom floor， Morgan is unaware just how much her life is about to change and how her strength will be tested。 Despite her inclination to always expect the worst， this book is true reminder of the im Abi Morgan is an Emmy award winning UK screenwriter and playwright who juggles a career， family， and cancer。 This book is her memoir and is a stunning collection of words and thoughts that are all too relatable despite Morgan’s traumatic experiences。 When she finds her husband unconscious on their bathroom floor， Morgan is unaware just how much her life is about to change and how her strength will be tested。 Despite her inclination to always expect the worst， this book is true reminder of the importance to be happy in the present。At first， I couldn’t get into the stream of consciousness narrative and the jumping back and forth between events， but I do think this contributed to the relatability of the book and humanized the narrative。 。。。more

Stephanie ，

One day author Abi Morgan's partner collapsed due to a rare condition。 After months in a medically induced coma where survival was often touch and go， he awakens only to believe Morgan an imposter posing as his partner。 It's not just that he didn't recognize her， he knew who she was supposed to be， but actively disbelieved she was who she said。 Who even knew that could happen？！ In This is Not a Pity Memoir play and screenwriter Abi Morgan chronicles with touching strength， honesty， and intimacy， One day author Abi Morgan's partner collapsed due to a rare condition。 After months in a medically induced coma where survival was often touch and go， he awakens only to believe Morgan an imposter posing as his partner。 It's not just that he didn't recognize her， he knew who she was supposed to be， but actively disbelieved she was who she said。 Who even knew that could happen？！ In This is Not a Pity Memoir play and screenwriter Abi Morgan chronicles with touching strength， honesty， and intimacy， her and her family's experience with rare medical tragedy turning their lives upside down。Thanks to Mariner Books for the ARC。 。。。more

Laila Ghaffar ，

I’m really moved that somebody can write grief with so much generosity and humour and honesty

Lynne ，

This memoir is beautifully written， in a way that combines self-deprecating humor with raw honesty。 Not surprising， considering Abi Morgan is an Emmy Award-winning screenwriter。 Abi makes notes along the way that feel like an insight into her screen-writing process: “Not cancer too。 It’s too repetitive after the coma。”This book explores different aspects of love and friendship。 Can it be love if your partner thinks you are an imposter （capgras syndrome）？ Is it a different kind of love when your This memoir is beautifully written， in a way that combines self-deprecating humor with raw honesty。 Not surprising， considering Abi Morgan is an Emmy Award-winning screenwriter。 Abi makes notes along the way that feel like an insight into her screen-writing process: “Not cancer too。 It’s too repetitive after the coma。”This book explores different aspects of love and friendship。 Can it be love if your partner thinks you are an imposter （capgras syndrome）？ Is it a different kind of love when your partner is only 5% of their former self。 Abi also explores the power of friends and family in dealing with trauma and learning to survive。 。。。more

GiGi Ropp ，

A painful memoir about love and loss and， most of all， friendship that displays all of the different forms love can take while experiencing heartbreaking illness。 Abi Morgan expresses her most vulnerable feelings beautifully mixed with just enough humor to keep the reader emotionally invested while not plunging him/her into the depths。

Alyssa ，

Thank you HarperCollins for the advanced copy。 In her memoir， Abi Morgan tells the heartbreaking story of her husband surviving MS complications and a coma only to wake up and not remember her。 The way she writes， it felt like she was sitting there in front of me telling her story。 It was raw and I could feel her heartbreak。 She is very honest in the way she tells her story， even telling stories that don't necessarily show her in the best light。 Overall， a great read。 Thank you HarperCollins for the advanced copy。 In her memoir， Abi Morgan tells the heartbreaking story of her husband surviving MS complications and a coma only to wake up and not remember her。 The way she writes， it felt like she was sitting there in front of me telling her story。 It was raw and I could feel her heartbreak。 She is very honest in the way she tells her story， even telling stories that don't necessarily show her in the best light。 Overall， a great read。 。。。more

Emily （emilymay_reads） ，

4½ stars

Andrew ，

Interesting but written like her dramas！

Nicole ，

This was such a raw and heartbreaking book。 Morgans writing is so honest and raw， It is clear that she has put so much into this memoir。 This was a really great book， I have already recommended this book to some friends。 Definitely recommend！

Kelly Kilpatrick ，

Abi Morgan’s long-time partner and father to her children， Jacob， is undergoing treatment for multiple sclerosis （MS）。 He suddenly collapses， sending Abi’s world spiraling。 As an award-winning screenwriter and playwriter， her world isn’t like the movies。 After 6 months and being in a medically induced coma， Jacob， is slowly becoming himself again， despite some damage cause to his brain。 Something is wrong。 He keeps saying “I’m not his Abi。” But if I’m not his Abi then who am I。 The book begins w Abi Morgan’s long-time partner and father to her children， Jacob， is undergoing treatment for multiple sclerosis （MS）。 He suddenly collapses， sending Abi’s world spiraling。 As an award-winning screenwriter and playwriter， her world isn’t like the movies。 After 6 months and being in a medically induced coma， Jacob， is slowly becoming himself again， despite some damage cause to his brain。 Something is wrong。 He keeps saying “I’m not his Abi。” But if I’m not his Abi then who am I。 The book begins with Jacob’s collapse and spans over two years。 The story intertwines with Abi’s love for Jacob and her family， but also the hardships of dealing with a loved one through a devastating illness。 We see such a vulnerable side of Abi and her reasons for loving Jacob， in his old and new life。 Abi’s fractured writing style makes you feel like you are really inside her mind-it’s so real， raw， emotional and heartbreaking。 We see Abi evolve in the trauma and maybe become “Jacob’s Abi。” This book is truly brilliant。 This is not a pity memoir。 This is a love story。Thank you to Abi Morgan and HarperCollins for sending me an ARC copy for my honest review。 。。。more

Stefany Krantz ，

🌟Book Review🌟⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️Raw， emotional， heartbreaking， real， humorous， and vividly surreal。 This book made me want to hug my people and remind them what a gift each day we have together is。 Thank you @abimorgan9 for sharing this heart wrenching story and showing the world that love can conquer all things。 You are so incredibly strong and brilliant。 This book is truly a gift to anyone who picks it up。 May Jacob continue to heal and life persist towards complete healing。 You guys， read this book。 S 🌟Book Review🌟⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️Raw， emotional， heartbreaking， real， humorous， and vividly surreal。 This book made me want to hug my people and remind them what a gift each day we have together is。 Thank you @abimorgan9 for sharing this heart wrenching story and showing the world that love can conquer all things。 You are so incredibly strong and brilliant。 This book is truly a gift to anyone who picks it up。 May Jacob continue to heal and life persist towards complete healing。 You guys， read this book。 Synopsis:What happens when your partner of twenty years suddenly believes you’re nothing but a stranger？ What do you do when your history together is gone？How do you prove you’re not an imposter in your own life？ When the partner of Emmy Award–winning screenwriter Abi Morgan abruptly collapsed from a mysterious illness， doctors were concerned that he would not survive。 Then， six months later， Jacob woke from his coma， to the delight and relief of his family and friends—except this proved to be anything but a Hollywood ending。 Because to Jacob， the woman standing at his bedside， who had cared for him all these months， was not his partner。 Not his children’s mother。 Not the woman he loved。 Sure， she looked like his Abi， but this was an imposter， living someone else’s life。Finding herself dropped into a real-life night-mare seemingly ripped from the pages of a thriller， Abi must find a way to hang on to not only their past but also their future together， before it slips away from them both。 With grace， an irresistible sense of humor and refreshingly raw honesty， This Is Not a Pity Memoir grapples with a journey through fear and redemption few should have to face。What do you do when you are losing your love？ You don’t write a pity memoir。 You write a love story。 Thank you to @harpercollins for the arc。 Thank you @abimorgan9 for your beautiful writing and amazing story of strength and love。 #bookstagram #bookstagrammer #abimorgan #harpercollins #read #reading #readersofinstagram #readwithme #booknerd #nonfictionbooks #memoir Drops on June 7th， 2022！ 。。。more

Carlee Miller ，

This is Not a Pity Memoir is a heart wrenching and deeply vulnerable memoir detailing how a family survives and perseveres through significant adversity。 Abi Morgan’s husband Jacob， collapses one day and is critically ill and hospitalized with no guarantee that he will live and recover。 When Jacob does wake up， he sees Abi as an imposter and not his real love， and overall has significant brain damage which affects the entire family in his healing process。 Abi also suffers from breast cancer in t This is Not a Pity Memoir is a heart wrenching and deeply vulnerable memoir detailing how a family survives and perseveres through significant adversity。 Abi Morgan’s husband Jacob， collapses one day and is critically ill and hospitalized with no guarantee that he will live and recover。 When Jacob does wake up， he sees Abi as an imposter and not his real love， and overall has significant brain damage which affects the entire family in his healing process。 Abi also suffers from breast cancer in the midst of Jacob’s recovery， which confounds the challenges already faced by her family。 Abi Morgan is a screenwriter which clearly influences the style of writing。 I really enjoyed this book and was inspired by Abi’s brutal honesty and perseverance in the face of great challenges。 The flashbacks to Abi and Jacob’s life before his collapse demonstrated the love they have for each other， and shows why Abi will go to the lengths she does to care for Jacob even when he doesn’t recognize her。 Thank you Harper Collins for providing me with an advanced copy of this book！ 。。。more

Ruth ，

This is a really hard book to review and rate。 It is devastatingly， gruellingly traumatic and sad， all the more so because Abi Morgan is writing about her real life。 This all actually happened to her。 So it's hard to say it's enjoyable， or to tell someone to read it， because you feel like you're throwing them at a difficult， potentially triggering experience。Maybe it's enough to say it's searingly honest， and gripping in the way a thriller can be gripping - you're horrified and yet you want to k This is a really hard book to review and rate。 It is devastatingly， gruellingly traumatic and sad， all the more so because Abi Morgan is writing about her real life。 This all actually happened to her。 So it's hard to say it's enjoyable， or to tell someone to read it， because you feel like you're throwing them at a difficult， potentially triggering experience。Maybe it's enough to say it's searingly honest， and gripping in the way a thriller can be gripping - you're horrified and yet you want to know how things turn out。 I felt it could have been tightened up in places， only as it felt like there was some repetition towards the end， but by that point in the story I was thinking she could just write whatever she wanted right now， because of everything that's been going on！This was both a difficult book （theme） and an easy book （style）。 I felt pretty wrung out by the end of it， and I really， really hope that Jacob continues to improve and that Abi will remain cancer-free。 。。。more

Sarah Beth ，

I received an uncorrected proof copy from HarperCollins in exchange for an honest review。 Abi Morgan is a successful screenwriter and playwright who lives with her long-term partner Jacob and their two teenage children。 Her story takes an abrupt turn when she returns home to see Jacob， who had been undergoing treatment for multiple sclerosis， collapsed on the bathroom floor。 What follows is a dizzying series of months of unknowns。 Ultimately， Jacob's uncontrollable seizures lead to him being pla I received an uncorrected proof copy from HarperCollins in exchange for an honest review。 Abi Morgan is a successful screenwriter and playwright who lives with her long-term partner Jacob and their two teenage children。 Her story takes an abrupt turn when she returns home to see Jacob， who had been undergoing treatment for multiple sclerosis， collapsed on the bathroom floor。 What follows is a dizzying series of months of unknowns。 Ultimately， Jacob's uncontrollable seizures lead to him being placed in a medically induced coma。 When he finally regains consciousness， he recognizes everyone - everyone but Abi， who he believes is an imposter。 This is a grippingly raw memoir that covers two years of turmoil and uncertainty in the life of the author。 Morgan does not shy away from sharing dark moments and acknowledging painful truths of feelings she encountered as she navigated the new and unexpected reality of her life and the changes her partner goes through。 Her rage， grief， resentment， fear， and love for her family all show through。 Her honesty made this memoir feel grounded and truthful in a way that many do not。 I flew through this book and felt such compassion for every member of Abi's family and the loss they are grappling with over the course of the book。 This is the story of a marriage that is not quite a marriage， a family that doesn't quite feel like a family due to Jacob's health crisis， and the true test of love even as our partners change irrevocably。 This was a moving memoir of how we can lose someone even when they are still alive， told by an excellent writer who isn't afraid to expose her darkest and deepest emotions， 。。。more

Vansa ，

This title caught my eye， and I like Abi MOrgan's screenwriting work-Iron Lady and Suffragette among others。 THis book was a devastating， moving account of her husband， Jacob Krichefski's severe reaction to the withdrawal of a test drug， that affected his MS， the effect on the family， with Abi's memories of their meet-cute and life to that point， interspersed between。 Her writing about their relationship captures the little notes of sharing your life with someone else so perfectly， you catch you This title caught my eye， and I like Abi MOrgan's screenwriting work-Iron Lady and Suffragette among others。 THis book was a devastating， moving account of her husband， Jacob Krichefski's severe reaction to the withdrawal of a test drug， that affected his MS， the effect on the family， with Abi's memories of their meet-cute and life to that point， interspersed between。 Her writing about their relationship captures the little notes of sharing your life with someone else so perfectly， you catch your breath at how accurate and lovely it is。 Abi and her partner are perfect for each other， but also so real， in the way human beings are， and it's not easy to capture this in as pitch-perfect a tone as Morgan's achieved in this。 Morgan captures the gamut of emotions you go through when a family member's hospitalised-the exhaustion， the constant worry， coordinating logistics for visits， the feeling you have of constantly being on tenterhooks waiting for news， and hoping for the best while fearing the worst， and it usually falls somewhere in-between！ She doesn't gloss over any of it at all， and offer platitudes of hope-her writing shows you what it's like in all its pain and difficulty， where you just put one foot in front of the other and get through the day。 Morgan's situation caused her more emotional pain when Krichefski developed a mental health problem that prevented him from recognising her， so she practically has to develop their relationship from scratch。 Hr writing is so raw， and so relatable-she doesn't omit aspects that might make her seem unsympathetic， which adds to just how deeply real the book is。 We all experience feelings of frustration and anger and self-pity in circumstances like this， and who among us hasn't thought about how this would play out in a movie？ Morgan's movie imaginings are obviously far better than ours would be， given her scriptwriting talent， and it's also a great insight into the process of writing for screen， how something would play out， what bits would get edited out because things really couldn't be like that！ It really was like that for Morgan， though， and the ending had me in absolute tears。 Like the title defiantly states， this is not a pity memoir。 THis is a love story 。。。more

Rachel （bookmamareviews） ，

Absolutely gorgeous

Cath Higgins ，

I was putting off reading this for some time。 Not because I wasn’t interested， I was really keen to be honest。 But because I assumed it would ‘difficult’ to read with so much other difficult stuff happening pretty much everywhere。 But I as so wrong， utterly utterly wrong。 Of course this isn’t a light read， a throwaway kind of frippery that you can pick up and put down again without thinking。 But I really should’ve believed the title， There is no pity here， no woe is me， I’m so hard done by， what I was putting off reading this for some time。 Not because I wasn’t interested， I was really keen to be honest。 But because I assumed it would ‘difficult’ to read with so much other difficult stuff happening pretty much everywhere。 But I as so wrong， utterly utterly wrong。 Of course this isn’t a light read， a throwaway kind of frippery that you can pick up and put down again without thinking。 But I really should’ve believed the title， There is no pity here， no woe is me， I’m so hard done by， what have I done to deserve all this。 Instead there is so much tender wit， so much resilience， so many ‘fireflies’， so much acceptance that whilst nothing will ever be the same again， things can， and will， be good again。 One of the most human and humane books I’ve read。 Simply a MUST read。 。。。more

Joey ，

Astonishingly good。 Broke my heart and filled it back up again